Jennifer Allan's Selling to Your Sphere of Influence - No Sales Pitch Required!

Quoted with permission from Go-Givers Sell More by Bob Burg and John David Mann:

"You may have been taught that to be successful in sales, you need to "step outside of your comfort zone." Let's reexamine that idea. If you push yourself to a place that makes you uncomfortable, chances are pretty good you'll end up making the other person uncomfortable, too. Consciously or not, they'll sense your discomfort - and attitudes are contageous.

We human beings tend to resist discomfort; in fact, we'll typically do anything to avoid putting outselves in uncomfortable situations. Why base your entire career on something your strongest instincts tell you to avoid?"

One fine day last spring, I got a phone call from a real estate agent whose name didn't ring a bell.

This agent whose name didn't ring a bell small-talked with me for a few minutes, while I racked my brain to figure out if he was someone I should remember.

Well, when the small-talking was done, he asked me if I knew anyone moving to his town that I could refer to him. Ahhhhhh, sez Jennifer, Now I get it. He's prospecting. Well, I know it's hard to believe, but I didn't happen to know anyone moving to his area, so I told him he could send me an email with his contact information and I'd be glad to let him know if that situation changes. He bade me farewell and hung up. And I never heard from him.

I thought it was pretty funny, not to mention an abysmal waste of his time - cold-calling someone and asking for referrals - and then not even following up?? Interesting strategy.

But over the next month, I got more such calls from agents around the country. Agents whose names I DID recognize; agents who were followers of my philosophy which specifically advises against any form of referral-begging. All asking me if I knew anyone moving to their area.

Now I was confused. What was inspiring this flurry of referral-begging activity?

I gently tried to dissuade the callers from making more such calls to their spheres of influence, but they all seemed determined and even enthusiastic about it.

Well, okay. To each his or her own. Far be it from me to talk someone out of a prospecting technique they're excited about.

It finally dawned on me that these calls must be part of a corporate training program. My assumption was correct - there was a program making the rounds where participants were instructed to call 100 people per day (or maybe it was per week) and ask for referrals.

Whatever. I think it's a ridiculous strategy to abuse friendships with any sort of referral-begging, but apparently I'm in the minority there, at least in the world of real estate training. I'll just say that I don't like it when it's done to me, so it's a given that I will never do it to anyone else.

But the epilogue to this story is that I heard from one of the agents again the other day. Was she calling to hit me up again for referrals to her area? Nope. She was calling to apologize for doing it the first time. That she'd felt sick to her stomach doing it, not only to me, but to the other dozens of friends and acquaintances she subjected her pitch to. She is concerned that she'd actually damaged her friendships and was asking for advice on how to repair that damage.

My friends, if it feels wrong DON'T DO IT. IGNORE the well-intentioned (?) coaches and trainers and brokers who say you have to venture out of your comfort zone in order to succeed. Because there's a difference between overcoming a fear of something new, and doing something you feel is wrong. A BIG difference.

And you know what? You can tell the difference if you'll only pay attention to that little voice inside of you. It knows what it's talking about!

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DORKY: A style of writing, primarily used in self-promotion, which is predictable, boring, boilerplate or just plain blah. See also The Dorky Announcement Letter, The Dorky Business Card and the Dorky Online Profile.

I really really really wanted to post this blog about nine months ago. A quick look at the calendar would tell you that nine months ago was right around the 2009 holiday season. But smarter heads prevailed, and advised that I hold off until a more "neutral" time of year - e.g. the middle or end of summer. Wise heads, my friends have.

Why wait? Because what I'm about to say probably would have hurt a lot of feelings had I posted it during the heat of the season -- because it would have applied to just everyone who read it. Which means, of course, that everyone who reads it today may still be a little hurt, but at least it's not as, um, timely. You'll see what I mean shortly.

Starting around Thanksgiving, the e-greetings start coming out. You know what an e-greeting is, don't you? Basically a seasonal greeting card that is delivered to your email inbox instead of your snail-mail box. Nothing wrong with that.

But the messages in these e-greetings are... well... predictable. Pithy. Sappy, yet meaningless. Boring. DORKY.

Here's an example of a well-intended message I received last year:

May the spirit of the holiday fill your heart with warmth and love.  Enjoy this wonderful time with your family and loved ones.  It is with gratitude that we say thank you for our friends, our health and another year in our lives.

May you have a Merry Christmas and a Prosperous 2010.

It's only one of several dozen I got just like it; I'm sure you did, too. And don't get me wrong - I appreciate being on so many distribution lists and there's nothing WRONG with sending out a Dorky message, but here's the thing.

It's not memorable.

No matter how beautifully written, no matter how grammatically correct, no matter how gracefully your words flow, those words are forgettable. And therefore (sorry), your well-intentioned greeting will be forgotten.

And we definitely don't want to be forgotten! After all, isn't that the reason we send these greetings out? To be remembered?

How ‘bout something different this year? Something from the heart - YOUR heart that is - something that actually says something you mean; something you might actually say out loud if you were wishing someone you cared about a Happy Holiday.

Here's an example of a e-greeting card I got from one of my readers. I laughed out loud as I read it. I got a clear picture of my reader friend in my mind, and thought of him fondly. It's his voice, his personality. Might not be YOUR voice or YOUR personality and that's fine. But find YOUR voice... and USE that voice with this year's holiday wishes!

I know the standards of writing I've set in the past are causing you right now to eagerly anticipate sage pearls of wisdom from me; carefully selected words expressed in such an articulate, heartfelt fashion with a message so touching and meaningful as to make you pause, look into the deepest recesses of your heart and reflect on the things you should be thankful for in spite of the troubled times we live in.  Sentences so eloquently constructed they'll render mental and emotional images that will make you cry (just a little). You'll vividly and fondly remember all the joyful Thanksgivings of years past and look forward with hope and eager anticipation to all the Thanksgivings yet to come.

WELL......

Sorry to tell you - I got nothing!

Just enjoy your time off with family and friends and don't eat too much stuffing.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

So, open your mind to a new way to say Happy Holidays to the people you care about. YOUR way...

Just got off the phone with an ambitious newer real estate agent who is all fired up about selling some real estate. Some serious real estate. He has a plan. He's committed to this plan. He's passionate about his plan. He WILL meet his goal or die trying.

His goal? To have 35 listings in the next 90 days.

Impressive. And given his enthusiasm and commitment, I think he can do it.

But should he?

This agent is a follower of SWS which means, among other things, that he is committed to being the best thing that could ever happen to his clients. Which, it is understood, will result in business and referrals coming his way for years to come from all his happy, satisfied clients.

Do you see where I'm going with this?

No new agent can properly service 35 listings. Oh, I'm not saying that he can't HANDLE 35 listings (although it's questionable), but actually SERVICE them? No way. Very few agents of any experience level can provide repeat-and-refer-worthy service at that level of production. 

So, what do I mean by "service?" Well, you can bet I mean more than taking a listing agreement, hiring someone to put a sign in the yard, having the receptionist write up an inaccurate and boring MLS description, taking some awful photos, creating typo-infused home brochures and showing up six weeks later with a smile and an amendment to reduce the price. 

No, I mean overseeing all the moving pieces and parts of the complicated process of preparing, marketing, selling and closing a listed property. Really caring about the outcome. Making sure your seller knows you care about the outcome. Keeping your seller informed and involved. So many other things I've written about in the past.

Many say that most of the post-signed-listing-agreement functions can be handled by a $10/hour assistant. I disagree. But that's a post for a different day.

Anyway, I asked this agent if he really thought he could knock the sox off all 35 of his seller clients with his service... or if, more likely, he'd just find himself with 35 unhappy clients who would not use him again or refer him to others.

He's thinking about it. What do YOU think?

Stay tuned for more on the subject in an upcoming post...

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." ~  Dr. Seuss

In April, I did a teleseminar called "Don't Be Dorky, Be YOU!" which was about how to write interesting, relevant and non-cheesy content for your self-promotional material. During that seminar, I talked about the wisdom of being "transparent" to your audience; specifically, whether or not you should you share your personal beliefs and interests with your audience if those beliefs are at all controversial or subject to debate.

I used the rather obvious examples of *religion and politics. If you are a person of faith, should you make that clear in your personal marketing (whether that's your blog, your Facebook page, your website, your personal brochure and/or your SOI communications)? If you have strong political leanings, is it appropriate to publicly share those from time to time when current events seem to call for it?  

During the seminar, I said yes - it is appropriate, within reason. I explained that even though you take the risk of alienating some of your audience, you also maximize the chances that your candor will attract like-minded people with whom you will probably enjoy working. And even if someone doesn't agree wholeheartedly with your opinion, you'll still stand out among the crowd as simply being more interesting than most of your competition who is determined to play it safe and hang out in the middle of the aisle.  

Brilliant stuff, Jennifer, if she does say so herself.  

Well, last week, I had the opportunity to put my money where my mouth was. I sent out an email to my entire **mailing list, and, without giving it much thought, referenced a recent controversial blog I'd written.

Oops.

Well, sorta oops. The responses poured in, literally hundreds of them within a few hours. The majority of responses were supportive, even effusive. Neato.

But some were... shall we say... less so.

A handful of my (now former) readers blasted me for my opinion, and a percentage promptly unsubscribed from my mailing list and my Active Rain blog.

At first, I was shaken. I was hurt. I was mad at myself for carelessly risking the support of my readership. I berated myself for hours for being so stupid as to be that transparent with my precious mailing list. I didn't sleep much that night.

But somewhere in the middle of that sleepless night, I had an epiphany. While my transparency did indeed alienate a portion of my audience, it also solidified the support of a much larger portion of that audience, and also attracted dozens of new readers into my world.

I must confess that in my initial moments of panic, I considered apologizing, backing off my stance and returning to the middle of the aisle where it's much safer. But I didn't and I'm at peace with that decision.

Are you considering being more transparent in your self-promotion? If so, good for you! But be warned that it may take the wind out of your sails the first few times (actually, every time) someone nastily asks to be removed from your mailing list, and you may very well lose audience members. But be assured that there IS a loyal and supportive audience for your viewpoint (unless it's really wacky or creepy, LOL); one that will love you even more once they've discovered your common ground!

*See Post #44 for other, less-divisive examples of opportunities to be "transparent."

** If you'd like to join my mailing list so you can receive my sometimes-not-thought-all-the-way-through ramblings, just do that on my home page www.sellwithsoul.com.