A long time ago, in my early 20's (egads, nearly 20 years ago), I was dating an equally young lad from Ireland. He was planning a "holiday" (as they say in Ireland) back home for three weeks. As an insecure young lass, I was terribly worried that he would meet back up with his high school sweetheart and, OMG, CHEAT on me.
So, I did what every other immature young woman with a boyfriend does... I whined, I pouted, I threatened, I begged him not to cheat on me while he was gone. Every day for a month, I "reminded" him that he had to be good while away. Ugh. I'm embarrassed just thinking about it.
Then one day, my slightly more mature roommate said the magic words to me: "Jennifer, you need to BE the person your boyfriend wouldn't dream of cheating on."
Wow. WHAT A CONCEPT.
Okay, I promised this would relate to real estate, so let's rewrite my little story.
A long time ago, in my early late 20's (egads, nearly 20 12 years ago), I was dating starting up a real estate career in an equally young lad from Ireland Denver Colorado and was trying to drum up business for myself He was planning a "holiday" (as they say in Ireland) back home for three weeks. As an insecure young lass new real estate agent, I was terribly worried that he my friends would meet back up with his high school sweethearts refer their business to someone else and, OMG, CHEAT on me.
So, I did what every other immature young woman new real estate agent with a boyfriend does... I whined, I pouted, I threatened, I begged him my friends not to cheat on me while he was gone when they had a house to buy or sell. On the first Monday of every Every day for a month, I "reminded" him them that they he had to be good while away should remember how much I love referrals and how hurt I would be if they cheated*. Ugh. I'm embarrassed just thinking about it.
Then one day, my slightly more mature roommate inner voice said the magic words to me: "Jennifer, you need to BE the person agent your boyfriend friends wouldn't dream of cheating on."
Wow. WHAT A CONCEPT.
You can whine, pout, threaten, beg or just "remind," to get what you want OR you can simply BE such a terrific girlfriend real estate agent that your boyfriend friends wouldn't dream of going anywhere else.
*I'm stretching the truth here for dramatic effect. I actually never did implement these referral-begging tactics in my career, but it makes the story much better to say I did...
Sounds like a great game plan. I have some of those moments from when I was young as well. Thanks for sharing yours!!!
Jennifer- So what ever happened to that guy;-) That was a fun read...I was wondering how you were going to make the connection: well done.
JA,
Mixing business with pleasaure again, huh?
Your old boyfriend would have been insane to have cheated on you!
Jennifer, what a great way to view your business! Our attitude toward clients is so important and this makes so much sense. Thanks for sharing your concept.
Very Cute!
what a great analogy! we need to build a relationship in this business that lasts, and if we do our jobs right they will come back without begging, even if they do go to Ireland!
Now that is a story we can all relate to and learn from...enjoyed this one!!
Great analogy Jenn, sounds like you have learned a little in 20 12 years. Thanks for a great read!
I like it. It sounds a bit like what I tell young single friends of mine who are looking for a spouse. They always tell me the are still looking for the right person. I respond, "Don't look for the right person...be the right person and it will all work out! I guess the same applies in real estate.
Michael - Yes indeed, it does...
J&K - Amazing - at 41, you'd think I"d have learned all I need to, but... NO!
Susan - I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Robert - Yes they will, I promise.
Katie - thanks!
Debbie - sometimes it's easier to internalize a concept when it's outside of real estate, eh?
Scott - Well, I don't think he did...
Matt - believe it or not, I married him... briefly. Ahhhh, youth.
Laura - unfortunately, I still push when I should relax...
JA, well written and a nice little reminder that we all need to be the one that they wont cheat on.....
This is pretty funny. I picked up a tape series on "How to Seduce Women" or something like that when I became single after 18 years of marriage. It was one of the best real estate sales tapes I ever listened too. All you had to do was change a few words.
Jennifer - We have a license to "embellish" here in the deep south. It DOES make the stories ever so much more interesting. My husband (New Yorker, wouldn't cha know it) likes to call it my "story creep."
Hi Jennifer,
It is always best to strive to be the best, not just in your profession but in life as a whole. I know from reading your post that you are just that kind of a person. I try to be as well.
I love the analogy! Unfortunately, I don't know that there is much you can do about your boyfriend cheating on you when he was away or about your friends and family members referring business to another agent.
If they are going to do it, they are going to do it and all you can do is to let the air out of their tires afterward! ;-) Just teasing!
Bob Mitchell
ValueList Real Estate Services, Inc.
Bob - ahhhh, that's the point. If I were a great girlfriend (assuming he's a decent guy), he wouldn't dare take the chance of losing me! Same thing with our friends and family... if they consider us The Best, they'll enthusiastically support our business... but we can't whine or pout our way into that sort of loyalty and admiration.
Hal - Amen!
Robin - I Laughed Out Loud when I read your comment. Thanks!
Joe - give us some tips!
Hi Jennifer. Another great post. I am glad I have subscribed. I see business this way too.
Congrats,
Ken
Jennifer I loved this post. It was very creative and I like the comparison of the cheating boyfriend. It really makes you think!! I am really enjoying your blog.
Jennifer: It all boils down to actions speaking louder than words. If you are confident and do a great job, you will attract business....loyal business. If you are insecure, and show it in your actions, don't expect much.
Being the person your boyfriend won't dream of cheating on won't stop him from cheating. Even good guys (the majority) have their big dummy moments. (Ask a guy, he will agree) :-)
However, being the person your boyfriend won't dream of cheating on makes it easier to find another great guy if you have to dump the current one.
That's was a cute posts. The scary part. The whining and begging reminded me of my girlfriend. Though I like how you rewrote as well. I look forward to reading more of your newsletters.
Jennifer~ The most important thing is to realize that you can only control yourself, your thoughts, and your actions, not someone elses! You have to be the best you can be for yourself's sake, not for someone elses. People that cheat in any way (such as in business dealings,relationships, etc...) think it is ok and they make excuses for it being ok.
Oh my gosh.... this is so smart. I love the way you think and relate it to real life.... (haha.). But honestly, I can see your point. I dont pesture my clients to send me a referral either. They do it and most of the time, they inject a conversation about me very cleverly. Much better than if it was forced into the conversation. That is all seems unnatural and how good am I then?
I do have clients who sometimes I work with "go MIA" with me. Then many months later, they surfaced and ask me to show them some houses again. I think somehow there is a trust and liking that has been built because they could have just asked another agent to show and begin another relationship. So, for that, I appreciate that and I do make it obvious that I know about their loyalty.
Good stuff!
Good stuff!